Extraordinary times such as ours call for flexibility and adaptability, particularly when planning an event. Ever changing guidelines and continuous restrictions mean that right now, the only kind of wedding celebration that can be planned is a micro or smaller wedding. I’ve put together some tips on how to scale back your wedding whilst still ensuring you have a memorable celebration.

1. Take back your time

You have a wonderful opportunity to focus on making your intimate wedding uniquely yours as you have more time to work with. Wedding Planning is a huge time investment , it’s a job in itself and can be stressful if project planning and management is not your forte particularly when you are planning a wedding with large numbers. The admin that comes with guest management, RSVPs , planning seating, accommodation, transport is all vastly reduced and in some cases entirely removed as these are not necessary for smaller weddings.

2. Maximise your Budget

The other obvious pro of a smaller wedding is that you can maximise your budget , with more resources to use on fewer guests. You can invest more into the parts of the wedding that are most important to you as a couple , where your priorities lie. If you are foodies for example, consider a more elaborate multi course meal or an indulgent dessert station over standard wedding fayre.

3. Guest list

Having fewer numbers gives an opportunity to celebrate with your favourites and also an excuse to not invite the people on your list who perhaps were there to appease your parents or family. If you are having a non religious ceremony, consider that your guest list will automatically include your witnesses , your immediate family – parents /siblings who may also have partners, leaving room around the table for just your very closest pals.

4. Location, Location

Scaling back opens up the possibilities of different types of venues and more locations. Destination weddings become more attractive as again, costs are not prohibitive because of numbers. Similarly venue options such as a wedding at home, glamping, private dining spaces in restaurants, boat hire, boutique hotel spaces and other non traditional ‘wedding venues’ are options because they compliment the smaller size of wedding.

5. Guest experience

You get more quality time to spend with each guest at an intimate wedding and in turn guests have fewer people to socialise with and can get to know each better too. You could tailor welcome gifts for each individual guest for a destination wedding, giving meaningful

6. Styling

Personalisation at every step becomes easier with an intimate wedding. You can actually achieve the tablescape you’ve been curating from the pins you’ve saved on Pinterest and ideas you’ve gathered on Instagram. You can really splurge on hiring beautiful tableware as you’re not constrained by budget in the same way as you would trying to replicate this for 100 guests.

7. The seating plan

You can play around with table seating to add to the guest experience ensuring guests get to know each other better . Seating people on a round at the ceremony ensures everyone gets a great view is a popular trend right now as well as opting for alternating pews and chairs, even lounge furniture over traditional wedding ceremony seating.

8. Entertainment

Whilst a 10 piece show band is not the best choice for a small wedding or small wedding venue, there is scope to have a variety of entertainment options. A suggestion would be to have an acoustic set or acoustic performers which always lend themselves to more intimate settings and then you could play your own playlist for the party to ensure you get exactly the music you want to cut a rug to .

9. Planning events around the wedding

Intimate weddings give the possibility of extending celebrations beyond the traditional wedding day to other events like a welcome dinner or hosting a brunch the next day. As “buddymoons” become more popular, it’s easier and more desirable to plan post wedding trips and activities with your group of guests after the wedding.

10. Things you can possibly skip

Ditch the traditional format entirely. Change up the timelines of when you do speeches or how you serve food as you won’t be constrained by the format of a bigger event and there isn’t a need for more rigid timings.

If you are new to the blog, this series of posts are from a real bride & groom’s experience of working with a wedding planner. I introduced my clients Jacinta & Jeffrey to you here , we started working together in November of 2019 and they very kindly agreed to share their hints and tips to help you , what better way to get a real understanding of what planning is like than from a couple in the same position as you will be?! In this post Jacinta talks us through her wedding dress shopping experience and gives some really honest and insightful tips on the process, finding THE dress/dresses , as well as allowing yourself to change your mind to ensure you are happy with your choices.

Jass,where did you go for your dress shopping experience?
Initially I was set on simple, no fuss and modern style of dress, so I went with the wonderful Andrea Hawkes bridal as the designer of both my dresses. I completely fell in love with how Andrea combined elegance, simplicity and modernism into all her dresses. From the moment I received comms back from the AHB team, I knew a bespoke service was definitely the way I wanted to go. The communication was personal, detailed and so warm and this has been the sentiment throughout the entire process. I chose 2 looks from Andrea and started the process before Christmas.

As my wedding planning gained momentum however, and I had more conversations with my Mum around the overall vision for the wedding, I began to start getting a taste for a dress that brought some glitz, glam and DRAMA. So with this in mind, I reached out to my wonderful wedding planner, let her know my thoughts and that my vision had slightly developed and she was able to help guide me to where I could potentially find a dress that fit this vision, with ease and to an amazing standard of design. In essence I wanted to still keep 1 gown from Andrea Hawkes, but source a different one in style to have contrasting looks for the day.
Chenai booked me an incredible appointment at The Wedding Gallery. I was met with the most enthusiastic and fabulous consultant Dominic to help find the dress. The Wedding Gallery is truly a little piece of heaven and beyond dreamy! I would recommend booking an appointment to any bride-to-be, even if just for the inspo and the unmatched experience.My dress journey has been interesting to say the least, from being completely adamant on one style, to then being open to the complete opposite! One thing that’s for sure though is that my outfits for the big day (ceremony gown and evening ensemble) definitely serve both visions and I couldn’t be happier with the choices I have made.

How did you find both wedding dress suppliers?
I found Andrea Hawkes Bridal on Instagram! Hashtags really did help on this occasion as well as seeing tagged real brides. I found the wedding gallery through my wedding planner. As hilarious as it seems, I never knew they did wedding dresses so I never considered them before Chenai made the recommendation and arranged my appointment.

Who did you take with you to your appointments?
I have been lucky enough to have two experiences with this. My first appointments I went along with my Maid of Honour and my wedding planner. And my last appointmentsI had my Mum, my little sister and Chenai . They were both experiences we will remember for a very long time. We had lots of laughs, breathtaking moments and I felt like such a Princess on both occasions.

Was it helpful having your wedding planner Chenai there?
Absolutely! It certainly made me feel closer to her as it’s such an important and personal piece of the planning process, so it was great from a relational perspective. It was also reassuring because a wedding dress purchase is quite significant in terms of cost and what that dress symbolises, so to be able to have her there to guide me to not feel so overwhelmed was very, very helpful.

What Top tips do you have for brides looking for their perfect dress?
1. Don’t limit yourself to one style, be open to styles you never envisioned yourself if. Even if it’s just to confirm you are 100% set on your initial style! 2. It’s okay to change your mind and develop what you see yourself wearing on your big day. Just ensure you are as transparent as possible with your dress designer and ensure you follow protocol for any changes being made. 3. Have a few styles in mind to share with your designer/consultant beforehand so you have a solid starting point for your appointment.
4. Share the dress shopping experience with those dear to you, and take loads of pictures to remember the moment!

Thanks to Jacinta again for being so kind and open , stay tuned for the next one in the series where we talk all things decor !! This one is a going to be a good one, Jacinta has a clear ( and gorgeous ) vision for how her day will look and we are working with some of the best in the business to bring it to life!

This one is an essential read friends. ESSENTIAL. Wedding season is upon us and in this blog post I give you the definitive guide to good wedding guest etiquette. I’m going to start with what I’ve observed to be the most common irritations caused by Wedding Guests and what you shouldn’t do

• Don’t steal the couple’s thunder. You’ve been invited because the couple care about you and want you to share in THEIR special day. Avoid unplanned and unsanctioned speeches or ‘performances’. Unless you’ve been asked to contribute, don’t think you can rock the mic because you’ve had a few glasses of fizz and are feeling extra confident. I personally feel proposals at someone’s wedding are a HUGE no no. It speaks to a lack of creativity that you would choose someone else’s special day to propose to your partner. Unless ok’d by the bride & groom , but even then….It’s a no from me.

• Don’t wear white. I know of late we’ve certainly seen a trend for brides or grooms to have their bridal parties in all white also which can be really impactful. The age old question about whether it’s ok to wear white however, still remains. My guidance is to err on the side of tradition and just don’t do it . Don’t do it especially if the dress you want to wear could be considered remotely ‘bridal’ . To add to this, if a couple specifies a dress code, do your best to stick to it . (My two absolute pet peeves are jeans at a wedding (day guest) and flip flops at a non beach wedding. Get out of here!)

• Don’t challenge invite decisions. If you’ve been invited to the reception only for example, it’s really not ok to send a text asking why you didn’t make the cut for the full day. Similarly if a couple request no children at their wedding, respect this. Don’t try to negotiate or guilt trip. Suck it up, make your childcare arrangements then go and have a great time. Often, these decisions aren’t personal and based purely on finances , venue availability, venue restrictions and the prioritisation of close family etc. Making someone else’s wedding about you and your desires, is a huge irritation.

• Don’t be a badly behaved guest on the day – I’ve personally witnessed some outrageous behaviour at weddings that has caused the breakdown of relationships as a result. Remember you are a guest, behave how you would at your friend or family’s home. There’s nothing wrong with having a few tequilas and a spin on the dance floor with Uncle Rupert but keep your clothes on and your mouth shut when you are boozed.

• Don’t bring extra people to the wedding. Some of you will be perplexed by this. Stick with me. This is a common occurrence in some cultures where parents and family members play a big role in the wedding preparations and planning. The guest lists get larger and the invitations become more informal to the point where a table plan is used as a guide rather than an exact representation of what will happen on the day. I’m from Zimbabwe and my close friend actually had a ‘just in case’ table put at the back of her hotel ballroom to account for this. Low and behold, some distant relatives turned up who had been informally invited by her parents. True story.

• Don’t challenge meal options. Allergies and medical conditions ofcourse must be taken into consideration seriously and most people will do their very best to accommodate those affected. It isn’t always possible and affordable to have multiple meal options just because you don’t like something. Most venues and caterers include meat, vegetarian and vegan but beyond this , try not to impose your individual meal requirements on the couple.

Finally , a really big one for me …

• Don’t accept an invitation and just fail to turn up. That’s the worst. The actual worst.